Your Heart a Shield, Mine a Blade
by Twilight Joltik
Summary: Robin loves Chrom. Maribelle loves Lissa. Chrom and Lissa wouldn’t notice someone’s feelings for them if it hit them in the face. Somehow a tactician and a lawyer in training decide that the best solution to this is to pretend to date to make their loves jealous.


Robin had a bit of a problem. Well, he had several problems, really. For instance, he kept getting to breakfast late and finding Stahl had eaten all the potatoes despite him promising Lon'qu that he'd tell him how his cooking was turning out. And, he might or might not have known that lunatic sorcerer guy who'd attacked Emmeryn in his hazy at best past life. But honestly, neither of those really compared to his most pressing issue: Chrom.

Chrom was kind of a mess, if he was being quite honest. Good at breaking things, over-eager to help with anything, completely unaware of how people looked at him; if he hadn't been told it so many countless times, Robin wouldn't have believed this guy was royalty at all. But, worse than even his tendency to charge into battle without any regard for his own safety was the simple fact that he was just so damn likeable. As much as Robin tried- and dear Naga did he ever try- he'd been unable to find a single thing to hate about the guy.

That shouldn't be a problem. Liking your leader should be good, right? Robin thought that right up until after the siege of the Ylissean palace, when he was laying in bed processing the crazy night. When he remembered how that Marth lady had saved him from an assassin, his heart twisted. Chrom could have been killed, or at least seriously hurt! Why was that scarier than the peril Emmeryn had been in, or the fact he was sure he knew that sorcerer, or how they had somehow managed to get a thief on their side by bribing him with candy?

After some pondering, Robin came to a terrifying conclusion: he was freaked out by that because he loved Chrom. Not just selfless friendship camaraderie loved him, but wanted to kiss his stupid face capital-L Loved him. Loved a prince, a royal, another man. Someone out of his league in eighteen different ways at last count.

Similarly, this also meant he wasn't… straight, he supposed. Considering he'd barely even been able to recall his own name, it wasn't surprising that he'd forgotten this, had he known before at all and hadn't much time or reason to think about it until now. Still, it left several questions in his mind. Did he like women at all? What about people who didn't identify as either? Chrom was the first person he knew for certain he had any romantic feelings towards, so he didn't really know even how to figure out if he was strictly attracted to men or not.

Gods, his head was a mess. Just laying in bed wasn't doing him any good, so perhaps a walk would help him more. Quietly, he snuck out of his room and down the halls of the castle that Emmeryn has insisted they stay at after the attack, trying to remember where the courtyard was. To the left, right?

He started that way but froze as he heard footsteps. His heart started racing and he reached to the tome he'd brought with him just in case any Risen happened to be outside, but halted as he saw who it was. The distinctive silhouette of Maribelle came into view, and he let out a relieved breath. She was on guard duty- something she'd insisted to take up that night without giving a reason, but it was clear as day it was born from guilt at having sort of started this whole affair with that border mess. It wasn't her fault, as everyone from her precious Lissa to Emmeryn herself had told her, since Plegia had been trying to find any excuse possible to stir up trouble for ages, but he didn't blame her for feeling bad about it.

Waving at her with an attempt at a friendly smile, Robin tried to think of a good excuse to ask where the courtyard was. Say he'd dropped something there during the assassin thing? Yeah, that worked.

"Good evening," Maribelle greeted quietly and curtly. "Might I ask what you're doing up at this hour?"

"Uh, I le- dropped something in the courtyard," he stuttered out, really not helping his cause at all. "You know, when Chrom almost died."

In the faint moonlight coming from the hall's massive windows, he could see Maribelle smirking in a way that seemed as natural as breathing for someone like herself. "Oh, did you now? Well, I do believe Sumia has lost our little bet."

"B-bet?", Robin pressed, not quite having been able to process the meaning of that but having a sinking feeling it meant he'd been found out. "What do you mean?"

"Might I accompany you to the courtyard?", Maribelle asked with a smile more fake than Lissa's when she most certainly did not have a toad hidden in that bag she was holding.

Robin didn't trust this, or Maribelle in general for that matter, but what other choice did he have without looking even more suspicious? Besides, he didn't know where it was, so it wasn't even really unhelpful. "Sure, you lead the way," he conceded.

Going in the exact opposite way Robin had been headed, Maribelle hummed a little tune as she walked that he couldn't quite place but felt he'd heard before. Down a flight of stairs, and they got to the courtyard where Marth had saved Chrom earlier that evening, complete with a few stray marks left over from the incident.

"So," Maribelle started, dropping the smug smile. "It is Chrom that's caught your eye, is it not?"

His heart twisted. "H-how did you know?", he questioned. "I hadn't even known myself until about an hour ago."

"I have an eye for these sorts of things," Maribelle assured him. "Sumia calls it my 'Gaydar', but I'd prefer to call it a Sapphic Sense."

"Wait, you're-?"

She nodded. "I would be sorely offended if you thought otherwise," she stated matter-of-factly. "I mean, far too many people simply assume I am without thought, but I would think you of all people would take the time to ponder it."

"Sorry to say I hadn't," Robin admitted. "Though, if I had, I do think I'd have reached that conclusion. Your attachment to Lissa is certainly hard to just call platonic."

A smile, one without any ire that almost looked foreign on her face, came with that observation. "Precisely. See, I knew Virion was wrong about you being a trash tactician. You notice some things!"

"Wait, Virion said what about me?", he questioned.

Maribelle waved a hand as if to physically dismiss the subject. "Nothing that matters. That man is plainly obnoxious and even less perspective than yourself."

That was fairly obviously code for Virion having hit on her. Robin snickered at the thought of the verbal lashing that would have led to. "So, you and me both… anyone else in our little troupe?"

"What do you think?", Maribelle questioned with a wink.

Robin tried to think. "Well, you mentioned Sumia talking about such things casually so if I had to guess, I'd say her, and Sully and Lon'qu as well."

"Very good!", Maribelle praised. "Though, Sully could go for anyone so long as they could hold their own against her in combat, and Lon'qu isn't interested in anyone at all."

That all made a great deal of sense. Sully had many admirers of all kinds, so it wouldn't be shocking to hear that some of them she admired back, while he genuinely couldn't picture Lon'qu being greatly affectionate to anyone. But, he'd forgotten an obvious one, right? "What about your girlfriend, she swing both ways or just yours?"

Maribelle turned bright red and squeaked a bit. "N-no, that's not- darling Lissa… isn't aware of my feelings."

Seriously? How could she not be, they were as plain to see as a bonfire in an empty field! But, he supposed if anyone was entirely oblivious of something so obvious, it would be Lissa. "I… see. Uh, so, anyone else I should know about?"

A little sigh escaped Maribelle's lips, clearly of relief for the subject change. "Well, I have my suspicions about the Taguel and the thief that joined us tonight, but I've yet to confirm anything."

Robin raised an eyebrow. "Already? But we've barely even spoken to either of them!"

"I told you, I have a sense about these things," Maribelle assured him. "Besides, I've studied Taguel culture before. They're far more, for want of a better word, lax about sexuality. It'd frankly be more out of the ordinary for Miss Panne to be heterosexual! Not to mention she was rather blushy around our fair Exalt."

"Okay, so I wasn't the only one to see that," Robin remarked. He'd not exactly been in the headspace to pay it much mind, but he'd definitely noticed Panne seemed a bit flustered when talking to Emmeryn. "Good. And come to think of it, I kinda got that off of Gaius too."

Maribelle giggled. "How unfortunate it would be for you if those sweets weren't the only candy he joined us for!"

Right. Chrom. It was Robin's turn to blush as hot as an Elfire blast. "I mean, it's hopeless no matter what I do," he remarked. "Maybe Gaius would give me a chance instead."

"Don't you dare speak like that!", Maribelle exclaimed. "Love will never be hopeless until the moment you give up on it!"

"You think so?", Robin questioned, holding back a defeated laugh. "Right, so marrying the next in line if Emmeryn doesn't last the war is plausible, got it."

He was only met with a glare that could probably kill a man. "I will not allow that kind of talk. Considering Chrom thinks Sumia likes him and doesn't know that Cordelia does, I don't think anything's off the table with him. He's about as perspective as a bag of bricks, so it's perfectly plausible he could be head over heels for you and just not know it yet!"

The idea made Robin's innards squirm. "B-but he's a prince!", he squeaked out.

"And Lissa is a princess," Maribelle countered. "But I would never give up my love for her! If it wasn't for that feeling, I would never be able to muster the strength to fight in a conflict like this! It's the knowledge that she would be risking her life selflessly without any regard for herself that makes me able to do the same, because if it wasn't for me, she might not make it home! Even if it comes to pass that when this war has ended that she rides off into the sunset with someone else, so long as she's happy and safe, then my love will have been worth any tears shed for its sake!"

Robin smiled a bit. "Wow, that's actually really sweet," he remarked, choosing to hold back the "for you" part of that thought. "So, you think my love for Chrom would be like that; able to protect him and stuff?"

"Of course!", Maribelle exclaimed. "Love is the most powerful force of change there is! King Marth and Queen Caeda, their love for each other allowed them to fight valiantly for each other and create a world where they could be happy in peace. But, Lady Catria loves King Marth as well, and even though that love didn't better her own life, her determination to fight for him led her to be a crucial part of building that better world as well."

"Great, so I'm gonna suffer but the world's gonna be better for it," Robin remarked. "How wonderful."

Maribelle huffed. "Are you even listening to me? I'm not saying you're the Catria of this tale, I'm saying that regardless of if you're her or Caeda, your feelings are precious and you can't dismiss them as hopeless or useless!"

That registered a bit better with him. "Our bonds are crucial," he repeated. "So, matter what happens, it's important that I don't run from my feelings?"

"Finally!", Maribelle exclaimed. "I take back what I said about you being clever; you're as thick as your Prince Charming!"

Robin couldn't help but laugh. "Well, you're as enthusiastic as your princess."

"Thank you very much," Maribelle stated. "I hope to reflect some of her lovely flame."

"So… do we just wait and see?", Robin questioned. "Be patient about our love?"

Maribelle hummed a bit. "Well, I mean," she started oddly slowly. "There's… something we could do. It's what I wanted to talk to you about, but I got a bit off track."

"Oh?"

"We're both in love with, and I don't mean this as any offense to either of them, two people who are painfully ignorant to the feelings of others," Maribelle noted. "So, perhaps we could nudge them a bit in the right direction, see if that gets them to wake up and see what's right in front of them?"

Robin nodded. "Alright, I see what you're saying. So, we just do something that would maybe make them see us as potential partners? But, what?"

Clapping her hands together, Maribelle leaned a bit closer to Robin; so close he could see her eyes shimmering with excitement. "Simple: we make them jealous!"

"Jealous?", Robin repeated. "How so?"

Maribelle wound a strand of hair around her finger. "We convince them we're unavailable so their disdain at that will push them to want us so much that they won't be able to ignore it. In other words: we pretend to date each other."

Something about that plan sounded underhanded, but at the same time wonderful. Robin grinned as he thought about Chrom being as confused as he was when he realized he was upset at his being all lovey dovey with Maribelle. He hated to cause someone like Chrom any agony, but he also couldn't see any other way to get him to notice. And, if it didn't do anything towards Chrom, then what harm was there? It was a prank, almost.

But, there was one issue. "Maribelle, didn't you say that people know you're a lesbian?"

"About five people, maybe," Maribelle clarified. "Lissa, towards whom confusion is the goal so that isn't an issue, Sumia, who knows I've wanted to try something like this for a while, Sully and Lon'qu, who I'm sure won't really care much and even if they do they won't say anything to anyone else, and then Ricken, who can be bribed to keep shut pretty easily. In other words, it's not really a problem."

Robin nodded. "Makes sense. And no one knows about me considering I didn't actually know myself, so I'm not a problem either."

"Well then, it's settled!", Maribelle exclaimed. "We'll tell everyone that we had a chat tonight and decided we had feelings for each other, and start being 'together' starting tomorrow!"

"Good night then, 'darling'," Robin said with a smirk. "I'll see you in the morning."

He started to walk off before realizing he couldn't remember where his room was. "Uh," he turned around. "Actually, could you walk me back to my room? You know, to make people talk."

"Sure, 'sweetheart'," Maribelle said rather mockingly, taking his hand. Her hand was cold and clammy, and Robin was very sure of one thing as they walked back hand in hand.

He definitely was not attracted to women at all.


End file.
